I have s blogger confession. There are many times here on the blog that I hit the publish button and it’s very clear that the writer is not me. Today I want to share with you the truth behind this blog.
Blogger Confession Time
I’m not always the writer here. Oh, it’s my fingers poking buttons, but I’m only writing what God is giving me.
So many times I’ve hit publish and felt like a total failure for a number of reasons. The main one because I feel so inadequate to write on the subject because in no way have I mastered it in my own life. How can I possibly help anyone else when I need help so badly myself?
Last month I was considering ways I could offer more to the readers here and remembered an email request received over a year ago. A reader was asking if I had a bible study group, or ever offered one. At the time the answer was no, but now it seemed like it would be a yes.
So I put the study in progress, wrote this post and invited people to join.
Then a few things went down around our house that I’m not proud of. I became angry and annoyed at my husband for various things, was short-tempered with the children and quite frankly a mess. Then I start getting emails with people requesting to join the June study group.
What have I done?
Who am I to think I can lead a bible study group? I am most unqualified of all! My life is far from where it should be and my heart is weak.
I started praying. Maybe I shouldn’t be leading this study, perhaps I should just cancel it, I cannot lead a bible study. What should I do?
Elijah heard God in the still small voice and that’s where I found him too. Right in the midst of the turmoil in my heart, in the middle of me wondering what I should do. I felt a comfort, a reminder. It was if God reached down and whispered to my heart.
He reminded me that I’m not the one doing it. He was. I don’t need to have it all together, I don’t need to be perfect, I only need to let him use me.
So here is my blogger confession. I am weak, imperfect, failure prone, and human. If you are ever encouraged or uplifted by anything you read here, know this. God is directing my hands for you.
And honestly? That’s enough for me. If God can use me to encourage others, then I know he will use others to encourage me, and that’s the beauty found in the family of God!