Do I appreciate who he is?
I think it’s just who we are as women. We compare ourselves, am I as skinny/pretty/talented as she is? Am I doing as good a job as so-and-so? In fact, when it comes to comparing and measuring ourselves against each other, nothing is sacred.
We compare our families, our children and our husbands. Most of the time we (at least I) don’t even realize we are doing it.
Like the past couple weeks. In an effort to stop focusing on the less than desirable things about my husband, I decided to start sharing some of the things that make him awesome! I then invited other bloggers to make their own lists and share them here, and the readers the leave part of their list in the comments.
Here’s where I went wrong, because I love every post that gets linked up to the party, I of course go through and read them! As I am reading I find posts that talk about how sweet and kind and gentle and caring, their man is. And some-how, all those good things I was thinking/writing about my man, flew out the window.
I’ll be honest here. Hubby is about as sensitive to people’s feelings as a bull in a china shop. Without meaning to, he has hurt my feelings more times than not. He sure didn’t mean to, half the time he didn’t mean it any where near what it sounded like.
He sure is great with animals. 
So I’m reading about these sensitive men and starting in on the poor me thing again. Good intentions sure don’t last long sometimes.
But, here’s the thing. If he was sensitive, he wouldn’t last where he works. Those guys thrive on trash talking each other! In fact, I have been around guys who are sensitive, they make me think of women. Now, he could be kinder to me, but I am glad he doesn’t get his feelings hurt the way a woman would. He is a man, and I’m glad he acts like one.
Now if your man is the sensitive type, please don’t think I am trashing him, I am not.
What my point is in all this rambling, is to appreciate who he is. When you find your thoughts straying to the fact that “He never rubs my feet like so-and-so’s hubby does”; promptly think of something positive. “I’m so glad he helps me take out the trash each week”
When we focus on the good, after awhile the bad doesn’t seem as bad. Sure it may still be there, but we are no longer looking for it. Look for good, you will see good. Look for bad, you will see bad.
So my challenge for myself this week is to stop comparing him with others and to really appreciate who he is. Because the man God made him to be, is pretty stinkin’ awesome! 
This post was written for and linked up to Matrimonial Monday. Come share your encouraging words!
I link up at these Parties!
Hello, my name is Kendra. I am married to an amazing young man
named Jason, whom I lovingly call hubby when I’m writing. The only way I could ever explain our relationship is to use words like: crazy, silly, funny… well you get the point. He’s perfect for me! 
Oh why do we as women compare ourselves to each other all the time. My Pastor once said that women are worse at looking a woman up & down then men are! Its true.
People like us for who WE are and I don’t need to be someone else and I don’t need to compare my man to someone else’s man. The thing is, that other guy’s character we are admiring has a lot of bad traits too!
Great post!Always learning from past mistakes.
Iris♥
Iris recently posted..Registered at the German School
I always enjoy hearing married womens’ wisdom. Thanks for being honest and sharing this. Thinking of something positive when the negative starts to come with our man is so important.
It is very important! Really shocking just how fast we can start thinking negative.
I have fallen victim to that exact thing frequently.
I don’t know why my mind strays to those thoughts but they do…and it’s not always about why my husband can’t be/say/do/act/treat me like so-and-so’s husband. But I compare myself to other bloggers and other crafters all the time.
We are our hardest critics…even when it comes to our husbands, because, just as we are theirs, they are ours. Make sense?
But when it comes right down to it, after I’ve gone through the entire thought process of why my husband can’t be like another, I come back to the same ‘ol spot…I married him because he was who he was and it was good enough then…so it should be and is now.
Sometimes we get so lost in contentment that we forget what made us fall in love in the first place…the basics.
Great post again my friend!
Kim M.
Kim M recently posted..October Give-A-Way Extravaganza
A good verse to go with this is
“….whatsoever things are true,
whatsoever things are honest,
whatsoever things are just,
whatsoever things are pure,
whatsoever things are lovely,
whatsoever things are of good report;
if there be any virtue,
and if there be any praise, think on these things.
Phil 4:8
Great post! One thing that has driven me nuts since I married my husband, is that I’m more of a neat freak, and he’s more sloppy, as in he leaves things laying around. One solution to that problem, which I’m right in the middle of, is a MAJOR decluttering. And he is totally on board with that (and a little relieved, lol!). It is going to help CONSIDERABLY because the less “things” in our home, the less “things” that he will leave laying around, and that will need dusting. So everybody wins!!!
I even got really brave the other day, and started to chronicle my journey on my blog. Kinda’ put myself right out there for the world to see (shiver, shiver), with a before and after of every. single. messy. spot. in. our. house.
Sue@housepretty recently posted..Decluttering 101
Yep appreciating the best about our man is sometimes hard… because they act so crazy sometimes! Anyway, realizing that our husbands are God’s best for us is enough for me! Enjoyed reading and I love the photo!
Haha! They are crazy right? PS(I know my man says the same thing bout me though)
This is so full of truth on many levels, Kendra. We all fall into that comparison trap–especially when, as bloggers, we’re thrown in the middle of those kinds of situations. And I’m like you, I tend to forget to focus on the good in my husband. This is a great reminder! Thanks also for urging me to join the link up! (At least, I think it was you!
Great blog and blog hop, my friend!
That was me
I’m glad you joined!
Amen girly
This is so true! Our men are great just the way they are, as God made them! We just have to remember that they are who God has given us, not someone else! We must appreciate and love them just as they are! They have to do the same for us too! 
Blessings!
Misty recently posted..Wisdom To Understand Your Man
Amen, amen, amen! This is SO important in a marriage as well as with children. I hear ladies often complaining about their husbands. This is so great!!!
Kelly recently posted..Making It Count. {Matrimonial Monday}
So very true, and I love the way you put it. When we focus on the good, the bad becomes irrelevant. Thanks for sharing with us Kay. Have a super blessed day!
Love
Ugochi recently posted..MARRIAGE WITH A MISSION
You are so right. We should all focus on the good and not the bad. My husband can be a little thick sometimes. He really doesn’t even realize it. Poor guys lol! Thanks for sharing your wonderful post at The Gathering Spot.
Diane recently posted..Spicy Black Bean Soup in the Slow Cooker
“Look for good, you will see good. Look for bad, you will see bad.” Love it! We need to be careful what we expect and compare because it can lead to discontentment very quickly. Good reminder to appreciate our husbands. Thank you for sharing at WJIM this week. Blessings.