Joy Comes in the Morning ~Birth Story Pt 3

Weeping may endure for a night, but Joy comes in the Morning. Psalms 30:5

Weeping may endure for a night, but joy comes in the morning. Part 3 of my birth story.

When Plans don’t go as Planned, and Accepting a Different Plan are parts one and two of my birth story, today I’m finishing the story with Joy Comes in the Morning.

After I had been given some pain meds through my IV I fell into a fitful sleep. This sleep was interrupted around 6pm with a very very painful contraction. The midwife came in to check on me at that point and I rolled over to say something. That when I realized that I was either peeing uncontrollably or my water had broke.

The nurse helped me to the bathroom where I changed out of my nice and comfy but soaking wet clothes into an awkward hospital gown. They also confirmed that my water had indeed broken. I was in a lot of pain but sooo happy to hear that. Now, I thought, now things are really going to happen.

Once back in bed they checked me again. 90% effaced and still only 1cm dilated. I lost it at that point and started crying. It had already been 24 hours of pain getting worse and worse, but I was still at the starting line.

I began begging to get into the pool. However they told me I couldn’t get in until I was 5 or 6cm, because we didn’t want to stop the contractions. Around 8m they gave me another bit of pain meds. They helped me some but I was still in pain and couldn’t rest.

At this point I was in full blown (back) labor. Hard, back breaking contractions every 1-3 minutes. If I got 4 minutes in between I felt blessed. There was one thing that helped me at this point. Well two actually. Jason pushed as hard as he could on my lower back during contractions; and that monitor which drove me crazy on Friday became my focus. I breathed and focused on the little heartbeat that blipped on the screen.

I warned Jason ahead of time that I did NOT want an epidural no matter what I said in labor. Good thing too, because at times I begged for it.  “I can’t do this!” I cried; the midwife replies “but you are doing it”. Me “doing what? dying?!” I’m afraid my somewhat snarky side came out several times during labor.

Jason was my strength. He encouraged me, talked to me, loved on me. At one point he crawled into the bed with me and spooned. The heat from his body soothed my aching back.

I lost track of time and sometimes snoozed off between contractions. I would wake up saying something really strange that made no sense to anyone including me! Apparently I was having 2-3 minute dreams.

They had me get on all fours to try and flip the baby over, but it was so painful I could only do it for couple contractions before I curled up into fetal position again.

I don’t know what time it was when they let me into the pool, but oh how good that water felt! It lifted me and helped me so much. I still moaned through pain and occasionally begged for pain meds, but Jason and the midwife encouraged me and helped me focus.

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Around 2 hours before he was born, he did turn, the back labor let up and I felt the contractions as waves. In the water it was easy to take the waves and even though the contractions were stronger than ever I wasn’t in quite as much pain than I had been.

I’m not sure how long I was in before I realized that I felt the need to push. I didn’t say anything, instead I let my body take over and went with it. The midwife noticed and checked me, 7cm finally!

At some point I went back onto my knees while leaning on the side of the pool. With the back labor gone, this was the most comfortable position. I remember seeing the clock and thinking maybe 1am, maybe 1:30, surely by 2am… :)

No, not puking :) That bowl ended up working like a paper bag to keep me from hyperventilating between pushes.

No, not puking :) That bowl ended up working like a paper bag to keep me from hyperventilating between pushes.

At one point I heard a terrible crack down in my sacrum area, and wondered what it was. After he was born and they helped me into the bed I realized that my tailbone had broke. I broke it when I was a teen and that is one pain you don’t forget!

The baby’s head was there, I could feel it, and what felt like lots of hair. But the contractions weren’t very strong anymore. I was giving it all I had and I just didn’t have much to work with. Suddenly a HUGE contraction hit and I knew that was the one. I pushed with all my might and felt the head come, the midwife started saying whoa! whoa! whoa! (while trying to turn the shoulders) and I was like No! No! No! and out he came!

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2:30am Sunday morning. The ultimate Father’s day gift!

Joy comes in the morning ~birth story

Jason got to catch the baby, he wore long gloves to cover the poison ivy that still hadn’t quite went away. I hear a cry and “it’s a boy” and that fast I had turned and reached for my son.

He was perfect. I couldn’t believe my eyes, Jason and I gazed in awe at his little face and were amazed at the wonderful work God had created in my body.

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Weeping may endure for a night, but joy comes in the morning!

Weeping may last for a night, but joy comes in the morning!

Those hormones!!!

Now here’s the thing. I went to the hospital because I had ICP and we didn’t know what that would do to the baby. Turns out baby was fine and when we looked at the placenta there was only a few areas where you could see it beginning to deteriorate. If I had went into labor on my own at that time, a homebirth would’ve been completely fine.

But as a first time mom and being my mother’s daughter, I likely would’ve went another week an a half. Who knows what would’ve happened to the baby in that time. Maybe nothing, maybe a lot. A hospital birth wasn’t my first choice, but in this case, we did what we felt best and we still feel it was the best choice.

God takes care of his children and even though we don’t always get everything we want, he works things out for our good and I am thankful for that. Maybe someday I will get a homebirth, but in the meantime I am thankful that the hospital really went out of their way to help us have the birth experience we wanted, even if it was in a different location.

A special Thanks to Belle Hess Photagraphy for taking photos of our little one’s birth.

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Respectful opinions are always welcome

  1. Wow. :)

  2. Congratulations!

  3. Oh my gosh! Those pictures, the emotion is SO RAW and SO REAL, I love them! Thank you so much for sharing them! How’s your tailbone?!!??

    • I am so glad I had a birth photographer, she did an amazing job of capturing the moment for us.
      And my tail bone is still broke lol. It took it something like 2 months to heal when I was a teen and broke it. I’m guessing it’s going to take a lot longer than that now. Oh well…

      • I would have loved a birth photographer, but we had c-sections so we wouldn’t have much except before and after.

        I’m still in shock, I didn’t even think the tailbone could break during labor! That’s talent ;-)

        • lol! The midwive and nurse didn’t believe me at first, but I think mine broke again because it likely healed wrong when it broke the first time.

  4. What a beautiful story! And I totally agree with you that there is a time for hospitals and how blessed you were to have one that worked with you. With babies it’s always best to err on the side of caution. :) My first went from a homebirth to an unplanned caesarean so I know what it’s like to have plans changed. Since then I’ve had seven more babies – some at home, two in the hospital and one at my midwives’ clinic. No matter where there’s always a beautiful baby at the end. :) So happy for you.

    • I was very thankful for how they worked with us. For financial reasons we are actually just considering planning on hospital births in the future. Cholestasis has a 70% reacurrence rate and while a home birth isn’t that costly; planning and paying for a homebirth and then having to also pay for a hospital birth is costly.
      I’m so glad that hospitals are seeing how important it is to leave baby with the momma, and stuff like that.

  5. Dorothy says:

    I think that is amazing! So honored that you shared your story! I’ve enjoyed reading all 3 parts… But I want to know about the tailbone breaking! Is it ok????

    • Dorothy says:

      And my birth story did NOT go as planned either! BUT God knew our situation and things worked out the way they should. I recovered wonderfully and though a c-section was NOT my plan, I’m glad that God knew SO much better than me and things worked out. My little one had the cord wrapped around her neck and i believe had she come my way, she might not be here today, so I’m SO thankful for my heavenly father working out other plans. And my mid wife was great! My daughter will be 8 in September and I’m PRAYING for another child.

    • It will be okay. It took about 2 months to heal when I broke it as a teen, so who knows how long this time :/

  6. Beautiful Kendra, thank you for sharing. You both looked so happy, of course!! Blessings.

  7. WOW! Belle did an awesome job!

  8. CarrieBear says:

    Heehee, that photo of you looks identical to the one my husband shot of me upon the birth of my first! Totally smiling from ear to ear AND with eyes closed and everything! Awesome!

    And everything worked out for the best. You did GREAT! And what a trooper your husband was! Wonderful!

  9. What a beautiful story. Sometimes you have to just do what is best, even if that is not what you originally planned. I’m glad you still had parts of your original plan, but were in a hospital just in case. Wise choice momma. Being a mom is fun. It is the hardest job I have ever loved. Enjoy. Praying for your tailbone.

    Erica
    We Three Crabs
    http://ericabarker.com

  10. Rebecca McCombs says:

    Hi Kendra, love your transparency. I was so crushed at having to do a (non-emergency) home-birth to hospital transfer that I didn’t have the heart to post ANYTHING. Good for you :) And my tailbone broke with the last baby too. She was posterior and the pain was tremendous. I couldn’t stand up without hauling my body up by my arms for months. The baby is now a year and guess what? My tailbone doesn’t hurt anymore but it took a long time. Healing does come :) Blessings on your baby
    RM

    • That’s too bad you had to transfer. :( I fought the idea with all I had at first, but I did have some time to get used to the posibility. And it helped me a lot to focus on the good parts of it. Like the monitor was annoying at first, but towards the end I loved seeing that little heartbeat, I know if we do a homebirth next time I will miss that. As well, I honestly think nothing can beat hospital ice pebbles, I ate those things like crazy!!!

      I have to take it pretty easy standing up and sitting down too, but yup, it will heal. It did last time and I know it will this time too. :)

  11. You have a great attitude! My first birth did not go as planned (homebirth, but birth injury). I also broke my tailbone! Let us know if there is some treatment that you know of. 7 years later and I still can’t sit in straight backed chairs or drive for too long! The pain also flares up during different times of the month… ouch!

    • No idea really. Even though my tail bone healed pretty quickly as a teen I still got sore sitting through church on hard benches. :( No idea what it will be like after it finally heals this time.
      What was the birth injury if you don’t mind me asking?

      • He has a severe obstetric brachial plexus injury. He was a severe shoulder dystocia (the Lord brought him back to life), but him being pulled out tore nerves (the brachial plexus group) from his spinal column. He’s had surgeries and has been in therapies since he was 3 weeks old and Lefty will never be like his other arm (deformities and limited range), but he is my miracle. Works so hard for everything he has and has a spirit like you wouldn’t believe. It really is a miracle he is alive as the midwife was not prepared at all for his delivery (oxygen and whatnot set up) or for the emergency (some emergencies really can’t be foreseen) and waited too long to call 911.

        The rest of my babies were born in a hospital. By c-sections (which were so much more peaceful than my first son’s birth!) haha. Go figure. The risk of other babies getting stuck was too great and I never wanted my other children to go through what my oldest son goes through everyday.

        • Oh my! he is a miracle isn’t he? <3
          Really too bad your midwife didn’t have stuff set up, and waited so long. That was one thing I really appreciated about the midwife team I chose is the fact that I knew they didn’t take chances, I knew from talking to others that if the midwives felt like there was aven a slight risk they were transfering. And the fact that they worked closely with a doctor’s office.

    • No idea really. Even though my tail bone healed pretty quickly as a teen I still got sore sitting through church on hard benches. :( No idea what it will be like after it finally heals this time.
      What was the birth injury if you don’t mind me asking?

  12. Thanks for sharing your story!! Amazing family! Congrads. I was on the edge of my seat reading this!!!!!

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