Power of Hope in Darkness

Have you ever considered the power of hope when you’re in the dark? Whether your current darkness is an illness, lost job, overwhelm from life, whatever, it’s likely that hope is the only thing keeping you going.

I’m not going to sugarcoat the truth. I think most of us struggle with depression and darkness at least once in our lifetime.

For some, the darkness is there more than the light, but you just hang on. Hoping, praying that someday things will get better.

Common causes of depression

Many people who have no issues with feeling down any other time of the year often struggle with January through March. The cold keeps us inside more, and if kids are involved, when you do go out, they seem to get sick which keeps you inside again.

Certain foods, lack of good nutrition, or lack of exercise can make one feel dull and depressed. In general, poor health rarely leads to feeling happy and light.

Even ingredients in household and personal care products can contribute widely to depression. “Propylene Glycol” is found in many personal care products and is an endocrine disrupter, meaning it messes with your hormones. In particular, it messes with my “happy” hormones so I am careful about what goes on my skin for that purpose.

How about “baby blues” often called postpartum depression? It should be the happiest time of your life, with a new little one to love But thanks to some seriously jacked up hormones, you hardly recognize the person you’ve become.

So this is my story…

A sweet baby who had lots of tummy aches and cried more than he didn’t some days. Who also loved his mommy very much and wouldn’t be happy with anyone else.

Months of broken sleep. Andre rarely slept longer than 2 or 3 hours at a time and eating often took at least 30 minutes or more.

With my other boys, right around the 4 or 5-month mark, my hormones did some changing, resulting in a month or so of overall dullness and slight depression.
I was ready for it this time and not so surprised at postpartum depression showing up later. (PPD can show up even 12 months later for some)

I typically struggle a bit with weather-related dullness/depression in Feb and March as well.

So guess what all coincided for me?

Andre hit 4 months in Jan, then we hit Feb and March. With Jason not having full-time work, all the tasks that needed doing around here, and illnesses of the boys keeping me home more, it felt like I hit a brick wall.

Every-day became a struggle. Sleep deprivation, dark winter days and messed up hormones pulled me down.

I purposely put things on my calendar, knowing that it’s not my nature to back out of commitments. Thus I had to get out of the house some and getting out always helped a bit.

I would find something I could do that would at least LOOK good and give me a small feeling of accomplishment even if for a short time. I wrote about that here.

I spent quality time with the boys, sitting and reading to the older ones and just holding my (often) grumpy baby. Hugs and cuddles often boost happy hormones, so kids are handy for that. 😉

I’ve long dreamed of owning a piano and with our larger house, that’s now possible! We were given an older one that plays beautifully so I would go in and plink around on it (I’m self-taught so pretty sure it’s only beautiful to myself and the boys lol). Music is uplifting to the soul.

I would go outside and swing a hammer and use a pry bar to break down pallets for a basement project. Exercise also helps with “happy” hormones.

There were other things I would do as well, just trying my hardest to keep going. Keep my head above water so to say.

But it was the Power of Hope that really kept me going…

All the stuff I did, helped I’m sure. But it was hope that kept me going. It was hope that had me planning reasons to leave the house. Hope had me spending extra snuggle time with my boys. Hope had me plinking on the piano. Hope had me swinging a hammer for an odd form of exercise.

I knew that once my baby hormones leveled out, things would look brighter. Once the time changed and the days were light longer, the mental darkness would start fading.

And experience told me that babies grow up. They won’t always cry all the time. They won’t always wake multiple times a night.

Hope. The dictionary gives the following definition: A desire or expectation of things to come.

I both desired and expected things to get better. The power of hope brought me through a very rough time.

Today I have a very happy and fun 7-month old who only wakes up once a night to eat. Spring is here, I’m getting my energy back and hormones are playing nicely again. My hope wasn’t in vain. We made it through and I’m stronger for it.

The Bible also talks about the power of hope. In fact, that seems to be one of its underlying themes. The entirety of the Old Testament is the anticipation of or hoping for the promised Messiah, while the New Testament is the anticipation of the second coming of Christ!

Today, if you are needing the power of hope in your life. If you are needing a reason to go on, grab your bible and go on an “egg hunt”.
Here are some verses and references to get you started.

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, which according to his abundant mercy hath begotten us again unto a lively hope by the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead,
To an inheritance incorruptible, and undefiled, and that fadeth not away, reserved in heaven for you.
Ref: 1 Peter 1

Beloved, now are we the sons of God, and it doth not yet appear what we shall be: but we know that, when he shall appear, we shall be like him; for we shall see him as he is.
And every man that hath this hope in him purifieth himself, even as he is pure.
Ref: 1 John 3

To whom God would make known what is the riches of the glory of this mystery among the Gentiles; which is Christ in you, the hope of glory:
Ref: Colossians 1

Is your hope fading? Renew the Power of Hope in your life by reading the following.

Isaiah 43:1-2
Lamentations 3:22
Dueteronomy 31:6
Titus 3:4-7
Isaiah 40:31
Jeremiah 17:7-8

If you are in a dark place right now, I don’t have all the answers for you. I can, however, pray for you and encourage you to cling to the hope you have in Jesus and to remember this last verse I want to share with you.

For his anger endureth but a moment; in his favour is life: weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning. Psalms 30:5

Do you have a story of hope in your life to share?
I would love to hear it!

*One more thing: let someone you trust, know that you are feeling dull and depressed. Ask them to check in on you from time to time. Depression can lead to thoughts of suicide and your life is precious. Don’t give up, seek professional help if you need it.

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Deborah says

April 19, 2019 at 5:12 pm

Hello Kendra,

I am a newbie here, and your story touched me because I have struggled with depression for many years of my life. But praise the Lord, for the most part it is a thing of the past, for several reasons: 1 I have improved my health in specific areas, and 2. I recognize the warning signs and can usually nip it in the bud. I see you have learned some of your triggers too, and that’s the first thing.
For me it has been hormone issues yes, but they get all tangled up with candida, hypoglycemia, emotional issues, food allergies, etc.

What has helped:
1. BY FAR THE MAIN ISSUE! Tackling candida, a yeast growth in the gut. It’s difficult to get rid of it through diet alone, but #1 is eliminate sugar. I also took a supplement from the natural doctor that includes high potency of oregano, peppermint, thyme, and goldenseal. From Integrative Therapeutics. I encourage you to study Candida, it was the first answer to my prayers about my depression, decades ago.
2. I wear a light visor specially for Seasonal Affective Disorder. I start in December when the days get short and overcast, and usually only need it 2-3 months, starting at 10 min/day for just a few days, and work up to 20 min./day. You can wear it while reading your Bible in the mornings. If it’s sunny out and I know I’ll be in the car on errands, I usually skip the visor. Get outside every chance you get.
3. Like you, it helps to just keep moving; accomplishments help. Although sometimes I just “didn’t care”, and I’m sure you understand. Getting out of the house helps a lot too. Doing something creative that you love to do, helps, although this doesn’t work if I’m in really bad shape. Like I said, sometimes it got so bad I didn’t care, and lost interest in those things. But it can help nip things in the bud if you catch it in time. I think it elevates the good hormones
4. Physical exercise helps, once you get started. It’s hard to make yourself get started, but if you can, do it. You did mention this, and I agree.
5. Miscellaneous: mold allergies tend to be connected… like musty basements, etc. Also eating mushrooms, cheese, etc. And for me, I’m one of the rare ones even my naturopathic doctor didn’t want to believe; if I use Stevia for several days in a row, it will bring on depression. But I did find an obscure article that talks about it, and I have confirmed it for myself several times. I am now working with a new natural internist, and she is trying to help me get to the ROOT of all my issues, as to why I have allergies in the first place. (She said my labwork confirmed I have eliminated candida overgrowth from my system! PTL!)
6. As far as emotional issues; if I’m in or near depression, then emotional issues will become huge and they FEEL like they ARE the depression triggers. But when I’m free of the depression, and look back, I can see it was just my inability to deal with issues in a healthy way, and so then they started me on a downward spiral.
7. Depression is just such a wicked trick of the devil!! The very tool you need to fight with, which is your mind, so you can claim the Word and what Christ has done for our healing – that very tool is what is attacked. It’s like trying to hold your weapon and your arm is broken! Depression is in the mind, yet it’s actually a gut issue, I believe. You could also look into the GAPS diet (Gut And Psychology Syndrome). If you’ve done juice fasting, I know you could do the GAPS diet even though it is VERY difficult. I will warn you though, that I jumped too quickly into the fermented dairy and I got sick (I’m still dairy free). But the principle of GAPS is very noteworthy. I personally cannot do it yet because of all the fermenting, (which is supposed to be what heals your gut) but I am one step behind that. Eventually I hope to get other issues taken care of so that I can incorporate the healthy benefits of cultured food into my diet. But this may be the right path to healing for you.

God bless

Respectful opinions are always welcome

Marci says
April 13, 2019 at 10:16 am

Thank you for another wonderful post! I definitely struggle with the dark days of February. We have an older piano, too, which I love to play (beginner music) pretty badly 😉 but music certainly lifts my spirits. I’m glad you and your adorable little boy are feeling better. Have a lovely weekend! -Marci @ Stone Cottage Adventures

- Kendra says
  April 15, 2019 at 11:38 am
  
  Even if we play “pretty badly” it’s definitely uplifting isn’t it 🙂
  
Linda says
April 13, 2019 at 10:38 am

Thank you for sharing your experience today. I’m sure you’ve helped many people.
Your son is beautiful. 😊

Megan says
April 13, 2019 at 10:51 am

Hope for me is HUGE. I struggle a lot with the depression, the gloomy feeling. Half of it is because I have chronic fatigue, so I am just really low on energy. My husband and I have also struggled with infertility, and hubby does not want to adopt, which is even more depressing for me. I have always wanted children, and never being able to have them… it’s heart breaking to me. I ask God what his plan is for me, and to lead me on the path that is his will. I live by the quote “God is good ALL THE TIME, and all the time GOD IS GOOD”. Meaning that I need to put my HOPE in Him, to let him lead me through life, in every moment, every situation, every heartbreak, even on my hardest days.

- Kendra says
  April 15, 2019 at 11:37 am
  
  Oh, Megan, my heart breaks for you in your infertility as well. Low energy and chronic fatigue are hard to live with as well. My HOPE and prayer for you is that God will walk beside you, carry you and be your comfort in all things.
  
Deborah says
April 19, 2019 at 5:12 pm

Hello Kendra,

I am a newbie here, and your story touched me because I have struggled with depression for many years of my life. But praise the Lord, for the most part it is a thing of the past, for several reasons: 1 I have improved my health in specific areas, and 2. I recognize the warning signs and can usually nip it in the bud. I see you have learned some of your triggers too, and that’s the first thing.
For me it has been hormone issues yes, but they get all tangled up with candida, hypoglycemia, emotional issues, food allergies, etc.

What has helped:
1. BY FAR THE MAIN ISSUE! Tackling candida, a yeast growth in the gut. It’s difficult to get rid of it through diet alone, but #1 is eliminate sugar. I also took a supplement from the natural doctor that includes high potency of oregano, peppermint, thyme, and goldenseal. From Integrative Therapeutics. I encourage you to study Candida, it was the first answer to my prayers about my depression, decades ago.
2. I wear a light visor specially for Seasonal Affective Disorder. I start in December when the days get short and overcast, and usually only need it 2-3 months, starting at 10 min/day for just a few days, and work up to 20 min./day. You can wear it while reading your Bible in the mornings. If it’s sunny out and I know I’ll be in the car on errands, I usually skip the visor. Get outside every chance you get.
3. Like you, it helps to just keep moving; accomplishments help. Although sometimes I just “didn’t care”, and I’m sure you understand. Getting out of the house helps a lot too. Doing something creative that you love to do, helps, although this doesn’t work if I’m in really bad shape. Like I said, sometimes it got so bad I didn’t care, and lost interest in those things. But it can help nip things in the bud if you catch it in time. I think it elevates the good hormones
4. Physical exercise helps, once you get started. It’s hard to make yourself get started, but if you can, do it. You did mention this, and I agree.
5. Miscellaneous: mold allergies tend to be connected… like musty basements, etc. Also eating mushrooms, cheese, etc. And for me, I’m one of the rare ones even my naturopathic doctor didn’t want to believe; if I use Stevia for several days in a row, it will bring on depression. But I did find an obscure article that talks about it, and I have confirmed it for myself several times. I am now working with a new natural internist, and she is trying to help me get to the ROOT of all my issues, as to why I have allergies in the first place. (She said my labwork confirmed I have eliminated candida overgrowth from my system! PTL!)
6. As far as emotional issues; if I’m in or near depression, then emotional issues will become huge and they FEEL like they ARE the depression triggers. But when I’m free of the depression, and look back, I can see it was just my inability to deal with issues in a healthy way, and so then they started me on a downward spiral.
7. Depression is just such a wicked trick of the devil!! The very tool you need to fight with, which is your mind, so you can claim the Word and what Christ has done for our healing – that very tool is what is attacked. It’s like trying to hold your weapon and your arm is broken! Depression is in the mind, yet it’s actually a gut issue, I believe. You could also look into the GAPS diet (Gut And Psychology Syndrome). If you’ve done juice fasting, I know you could do the GAPS diet even though it is VERY difficult. I will warn you though, that I jumped too quickly into the fermented dairy and I got sick (I’m still dairy free). But the principle of GAPS is very noteworthy. I personally cannot do it yet because of all the fermenting, (which is supposed to be what heals your gut) but I am one step behind that. Eventually I hope to get other issues taken care of so that I can incorporate the healthy benefits of cultured food into my diet. But this may be the right path to healing for you.

God bless

- Kendra says
  April 21, 2019 at 10:02 pm
  
  Wow, Deborah, that’s quite the list. I’ve definitely heard several of those things before as well. And candida is an issue for most Americans.
  I’ve looked at GAPS and it certainly looks quite beneficial. Right now, we are doing good to eat as healthy as we can on our budget.
  Sometime in the future, I do want to do another juice fast to reset and I’ve often thought the Paleo diet would be good for our family. We are all blood type O (meat eaters and should be dairy avoiders) so that looks like it would suit us well.
  One day at a time for some things.
  
  I love your analogy of trying to hold a weapon with a broken arm because it is spot on.
  
Insulation surfaces says
May 31, 2019 at 5:52 am

Thank you for sharing your experience today. I’m sure you’ve helped many people.
Your son is beautiful