There was a year when I was 10 or 11 that we didn’t get real presents.
The Christmas without real Presents.
We did get gifts, my sister an I opened a gift together and my two brothers opened one a piece. But we didn’t think they classified as real gifts. We each go new bedspreads. We had moved to a new house and things were tight and the warmer bedspreads were needed. There was also a beautiful picture that would be hung in sis and I’s room. But no toys, nothing “fun”
I remember thinking “is this all?” and I probably had a grumpy attitude. The boys were fine with it, if I remember right, they had loads of fun whopping on each other with their new bed spreads. My sis was young enough that she probably didn’t realize she was missing out. I remember feeling rather displeased with it all. Looking back at that young girl who had everything she really needed and was so spoiled, that a new, warm, very pretty bedspread wasn’t a “real gift”, I wish I could sit her down and explain a few things….
I would tell her that there are kids, who would be thrilled with the old bedspread on my bed. A new one like the one I unwrapped would be heaven. Then I would explain that the blanket was likely all they slept on. I would tel her that many children don’t even have parents to care for them.
Even more so, I would like to tell her that there are some girls her age who would just be happy for a safe place. A place where they wouldn’t be hurt, a place to feel secure and know that they wouldn’t be abused any more.
I would tell her that she is loved, and safe, has plenty to eat, and truly lacks nothing. I would tell her that with all the blessings she has, she is richer than 90% of all the other girls her age. Blessed beyond comprehension for most people.
So tell me, why is it we feel this overwhelming need to have stuff? Why do we feel that it’s not a real “present” if we get things we really need, instead of things we want? Something about our culture has taught us that we are entitled to, to this STUFF. Why? Which brings me to this question, what are you doing this year to remind yourself, or your children, just how blessed we are?
my grandpa tells a story of his worst Christmas. (he’s 93 years old) One year all his stocking was filled with was corn cobs, and he threw a fit throwing them as he pulled them out. At the bottom, in the toe was a 50 cent piece……a months wages for his family. He felt pretty foolish in the end after her realized the sacrifice his parents had made for his gift.
What a beautiful reminder of how blessed we really are. I love christmas not for the gift giving although I do love that but for the family memories we make. Christmas is not a glutony of gifts for our families but a time of fun and family memories. We often stop giving gifts to try a new game or to share stories of the year. Its a wonderful time!
This hits home, I also remember a certain little girl… Now, with 2 little girls of my own, we make a point of doing things during Christmas for those with less. One of the things we did this year was to fill a bag for a missions trip, ours was for a girl around the same age as my oldest (6). My daughter helped pick out items for the bag, and she packed it herself. We had plenty of opportunities to talk about how another little girl would feel when she got new sandals, instead of keeping them for herself, and so on. I haven’t gotten to it this year, but in past years we go shopping for Toys for Tots. I set a budget, she picks out the toys, if it’s in the budget, we’re good to go. If not, she has to pick another one. She’s learned to respect the budget.
As children of a poor widowed mother, my daddy’s family sometimes brought us children toys or clothes at Christmas time. I remember one time they gave one of us a top that spins, another one a xylophone and another a harmonica. I don’t remember who got what, because mother made us share with one another.
Then a relative from my mother’s side of the family dropped in and he sat down on the floor and played with all three at the same time. Sure wonder if he remembers that! I remember my mother laughing out loud about him playing with all three at once. I think now that she may have laughed so that we would see the funny side and not fuss about him taking our toys.
I started making a lot of our Christmas gifts, mostly baking, and this year, for one of our daughter’s gifts, I am just finishing knitting the flowers for a wool hat and scarf set for her, that she had wanted for the cold weather. She has other gifts as well, but we have gone very reasonable. We are also teaching her that more is not better, and more work goes into the hand made than the store bought. She also asked to give some of her money she had collected, to give a person in a local soup kitchen, a hot Christmas dinner. And she just turned 5 the end of September. I’m hoping this is God’s way of telling us we are doing something right with her, lol!
We had a Christmas like that when I was in the 4th grade. We got a free kitten for Christmas. Even though it was free, we didn’t know that, and it was one of the best gifts ever 🙂
As far as what’s up with people and STUFF? I have a some theories on this. One thing is that STUFF is a distraction. I think people a lot of people want stuff or buy lots of stuff to feed their emotions at times. Like if they are bored, depressed, etc. Getting new stuff gives temporary excitement, happiness, and can be a mood lifter. The problem is that people won’t be satisfied with the stuff after awhile. It will lose its effect. So then they need more stuff to be excited or happy again. And so the endless cycle continues. I think this is a lot of it for adults anyways. If people seek satisfaction in non material ways, then I suppose there would not be the need to have so many things.
You probably already know what I do to feel blessed, as I write about it. I keep a gratitude journal and hunt for blessings on a regular basis. When we focus on what we already have, it’s much easier to not think we need more.Good post by the way!
This is such a great post to put things into perspective, thank you!
xx
Kelly
Sparkles and Shoes
500 Follower Kate Spade Giveaway
Yes, we have high expectations for gifts, and we don’t realize how blessed we truly are. My friend works in South Africa, and she sent me a photo of little boys who made cars out of empty plastic bottles with the bottle caps as the wheels.
I grew up in a family where stuff was the norm. It wasn’t until I was in high school that I realized what it all meant… almost like my parents were trying to buy my love. It is very important to us that my children learn that Christmas isn’t about the presents, but about the birth of Jesus. I do let my kids believe in Santa, but most of our traditions revolve around baby Jesus.
Sounds like you are doing something right 🙂
Great post to remind us all to be thankful for what we have. Some of the best gifts I remember as a child were the ones my grandfather made. They were simple but they meant a lot to me, even today.
hubby’s fam. definitely goes with handmade a lot. The first time I went to a Christmas with him, I was given a very simple gift that I still use every day!
I feel the same way.
My children’s birthdays are all around Christmastime so it get a little hectic around our home. One thing we do is Operation Christmas Child. Each of my children make a box for a like child. We started this when my oldest received a toy from a friend that we deemed inappropriate. We returned the toy to the store and used the $ to create a box. The next year, she had a birthday party and decided instead of gifts for her, all the girls were to bring something for the OCC box. We filled 3 boxes from that. Now, this year, we are also giving to Samaritan’s Purse in honor of our family members.
One fun thing we do to keep our eyes on Jesus is we play the m&m game in the car. When we are out and about, if a child sees a nativity scene as a decoration, they all get one m&m. On the night we drive around just to see lights, we keep track and they get their m&ms with their hot chocolate when we get home.
Love your blog!
What great ideas! I love the birthday party one, what a great way to teach kids.
Absolutely spot on. I think people need to be aware and be grateful for any gift given. Some kids have never heard the word no. We saved up a very small allowance as kids to buy things throughout the year. We knew what it meant to save and the cost of waiting. So at Xmas, though always spoiled, we were grateful, because we knew what my parents had given up on to get us those toys.
My daughters are now 24 and 19. For the past 20 years we have purchased and donated gifts for Toys for Tots. Even this year my 19 year old and I still did this. It’s funny that they choose toys based on their interests. My older daughter who is a nurse chose baby dolls and “medical” toys while her sister who graduated this year from cosmetology school chose toy hair styling tools and dress up clothes. I think this will be a tradition they continue always.
We do tend to choose what we would like when we don’t know who will receive 🙂 I pack shoe boxes and it’s my believe that all little girls under 10 should have a cuddly doll baby to love but they also get match box cars, because who knows when they may want to play with their brothers! 🙂
I love that you have set a tradition like that.
Hopefully next years my oldest will be able to understand enough that he can be involved in packing a shoe box. I hope you had a wonderful Christmas with your family!
We’ve done Operation Christmas Child several times as well. Some of the videos of the kids opening the shoe boxes are beyond precious!
This Christmas, while nice, would have been better if my older daughter and her husband weren’t 2300 miles away. This mama’s heart needs her kiddos at Christmas. If you are one that prays please add me to your list that we may be able to find suitable jobs and move back east this upcoming summer.
I hope your Christmas was blessed and wonderful as well.